If I Could Go Back to My First Postpartum, Here’s What I Would Do Differently

After five postpartum seasons, and now preparing for another one, there are so many things I wish I could go back and tell first-time-mom me.

Mostly, I would tell her this:

Do not under any circumstances bounce back.

Pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, interrupted sleep, hormonal shifts, blood loss, and the enormous mental and emotional transition of bringing a baby into the world all ask a lot of a woman’s body.

It's an incredible, beautiful, powerful picture of God's love and the greatest blessing on earth. And, as worthy things are, costly.

Postpartum is not the time to prove how quickly you can get back to normal.

I felt a lot of pressure to get back into the swing of things, baby in tow, quickly. I thought I should be able to be a still healing, new mother with a happy baby and just go back to all the things, as if I just got a new purse or something....not a whole human to nourish from my grateful yet depleted body, care for 24/7 while leaking from all sorts of places (actually, babies kind of leak from everywhere too, don't they?), and bond with, get to know, learn and love while maintaining the basics of home/laundry/bills/eating/etc.

Wow! Let me just say....now I know better.

It is a season to nourish deeply, rest intentionally, receive help, and give your body what it needs to heal.

It doesn't mean we need to hide for 6 months (I do not recommend...keep reading). But it does mean we need to be intentional.

Here is what postpartum looks like for me now, as a board certified holistic practitioner who has walked with countless women through postpartum, and mother of almost six.

1. I Would Actually Rest

And I mean actually rest.

Not “rest” while answering texts, catching up on emails, entertaining visitors, folding laundry, and trying to keep everything running exactly the way it did before I gave birth.

Physical rest yes absolutely, but so mental and emotional rest.

I have learned that I do not have to make myself available simply because someone else would like to visit. I can keep my phone on Do Not Disturb. I can protect quiet time with my baby. I can accept meals without feeling like I need to host the person dropping them off or tell them thank you with a baby holding turn.

And I can ask for help.

Postpartum is one of the times when I think we need to become very comfortable saying both “yes, please” and “not right now.”

Yes, please bring dinner.

Yes, please hold the toddler.

Yes, please switch the laundry.

No, we aren't up for visitors today.

No, I'm not taking that commitment back on yet.

No, I don't need to be productive today.

Rest is productive postpartum.

2. I Would Eat Like I Was Still Pregnant

There can be so much emphasis on nutrition during pregnancy, and then somehow after the baby arrives, Mama becomes an afterthought.

We also think things like, "I'm not eating for two anymore and I need to start getting back to my pre-pregnancy weight so I better watch what I eat."

I don't want to do that anymore.

The body still has an enormous nutritional job to do.

It is repairing tissue, regulating hormones, replenishing what pregnancy and birth required, producing breast milk for many mothers, and functioning on dramatically different sleep.

This is not when I want to live on coffee and granola bars.

Clinically, I've seen many women accidentally kick their goals further down the road by making this mistake early on. Restricting intake and taking in too few real nutrients in this stage slows down the future weight management and hormone balance that you're really wanting.

Eat well these first 6-12 weeks so that by 6 - 12 months you'll actually be in a strong place with plenty of nutrient stores for a body to feel safe releasing weight and to be able to balance out hormones.

I focus on warm, deeply nourishing, nutrient-dense foods:

Slow-cooked meats
Bone broth and rich soups
Eggs
Healthy fats
Cooked vegetables
Mineral-rich foods
Quality carbohydrates (roots, sourdough, soaked/sprouted grains)
Protein throughout the day, all day

Continue those warm, nutrient-dense, blood-building foods rather than abruptly changing the way you nourish yourselve after birth.

But I also don't believe every postpartum mother needs the exact same foods.

One of the things I do differently now is pay attention to which foods my own body is testing best for in that season.

Pregnancy needs can be different from postpartum needs. Breastfeeding can change things yet again.

Rather than following one universal postpartum food list, I want to know: What does this body need right now?

3. I Would Rebuild My Minerals on Purpose

This may be one of my biggest postpartum priorities.

Pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, stress and sleep disruption can significantly shift nutritional demands, and minerals are foundational to so many of the processes we're asking the postpartum body to perform.

I don't want to randomly throw minerals at my body either.

During pregnancy, I use information from my HTMA results along with bioenergetic testing to help me individualize which mineral support makes the most sense for me.

I particularly love incorporating cell salts and trace minerals.

A broad cell salt combination is one of my favorite foundational options for postpartum mothers, and I keep my personal favorite available in the Pregnancy section of my Fullscript recommendations.

Then I customize from there.

Magnesium, sodium, potassium and trace minerals all are necessary.

And minerals and hydration really belong in the same conversation.

I focus on consistent hydration throughout the day, often incorporating mineral-rich fluids (like water with a splash of Ningxia Red) ... especially while breastfeeding.

4. I Would Keep Myself Warm

This is something modern postpartum culture doesn't talk about nearly as much as many traditional systems of medicine have!

It's fascinating, and so very helpful.

Across a number of traditional healing models, the postpartum period is viewed as a time when warmth should be protected, and the feet and lower body are given particular attention in relation to reproductive recovery. The uterus and reproductive organs are linked to the ankles/feet.

You already know this by the way nail technicians hesitate to give pedicures to very pregnant women, and massage therapists avoid the feet/ankles as well.

Warm socks.

Slippers.

Blankets.

Warm drinks.

Warm meals.

Not walking around barefoot on cold floors all day.

And no ice cold drinks!

It sounds almost too simple to matter, but postpartum is a season when I'm intentionally creating an environment that tells my body it's in a safe space for healing.

5. I Would Get Natural Light Every Day

Even if I am spending most of those early weeks at home, I don't want to spend them completely disconnected from daylight.

I prioritize natural light every day, especially earlier in the day when possible.

Sit outside with the baby for 5-10 minutes.

Nurse beside an open window.

Drink something warm on the porch.

Take a slow walk through the garden when my body is ready.

Side note: A little natural sunlight is great for babies too, to help them process the bilirubin and prevent/treat jaundice. Just a couple minutes for their raw new skin!

And inside the house, I like to make the environment gentler too.

I reduce harsh overhead LED lighting when I can and prefer lamps with warm, low flicker or incandescent light throughout the room, particularly in the evening.

A newborn already changes your sleep rhythm enough. I don't want my home lit like a grocery store at 9:00 at night.

I want soft light, warmth, peace, and cues that help the whole house begin settling down.

This also helps baby to properly adjust to the day and night cycle and set their circadian rhythm. Imagine the confusion caused to a newborn brain when being hit with flashing (you know LED flash faster than you can see, right?) synthetic lights at all hours of the day and night. Is it day? Is it night? Help that baby brain out so you and baby can both start sleeping well!

6. I Would Protect My Mind and Spirit Too

Postpartum healing isn't only physical.

There are hours of nursing, rocking, contact naps, feeding, pumping and simply lying still with a baby.

Earlier in motherhood, I sometimes felt like I needed to do something with that time.

Now, I see it differently.

Some of my favorite postpartum “activity” is simply putting on an audiobook and resting.

I especially love listening to something that builds my faith, like a Christian healing book, a book on prayer, teaching that encourages me, or simply turning on my audio Bible.

It allows me to rest my eyes.

Rest my arms.

Not scroll.

And still fill myself spiritually and mentally.

Sometimes caring for yourself postpartum looks like nourishing your body.

And sometimes it looks like lying in bed with your baby while Scripture plays quietly in the room.

A Few Resources I Love for This Season

Audio

Raising Girls: https://wildatheart.org/rhplay/series/audio/raising-girls

Raising Boys: https://wildatheart.org/rhplay/series/audio/raising-boys

Fighting For The Hearts Of Your Children: https://wildatheart.org/rhplay/series/audio/fighting-hearts-your-children

Podcast- From Our Home To Yours With Nancy Campbell (geared towards mothers; beneficial for all):

http://aboverubies.org/index.php/ar-podcasts-transcripts

Books

Wild At Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul https://amzn.to/2Yc80pm

Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul https://amzn.to/3kRTkn9

The Five Love Languages of Children https://amzn.to/38DNJL

Raising Spirit Led Kids https://amzn.to/2YnfpSY

7. I Would Let People Help Me

I would ask sooner.

I would accept the meal.

I would let someone wash the dishes.

I would let Dad take over something I normally handle.

I would stop thinking that needing support means I'm somehow not handling motherhood well.

You just made a human being.

Then birthed that human being.

And now your body may also be making all of their food.

There are seasons for carrying a lot, and there are seasons for allowing yourself to be carried a little.

Postpartum is one of them. And don't feel obligated to return anything like visiting, baby holding, or anything. A text saying thank you with a picture of the plate you made with their meal is perfect.

8. I Would Pay Attention Before I Was Completely Depleted

One of the biggest things I've learned, both personally and clinically, is that I don't want mothers waiting until they feel terrible before we ask what their bodies need.

This is also where my approach at Living Well Holistics has become much more individualized.

I don't believe postpartum care should simply be:

“Here's the postpartum supplement list. See you in 12 weeks!"

Your pregnancy was individual.

Your birth was individual.

Your recovery is individual.

Your baby is individual.

And breastfeeding creates an entirely new relationship between two bodies.

This is why I like to test and assess Mom and Baby within the first six weeks after birth.

We can look at questions like:

What foods is Mom testing best for now?

What nutrients and minerals does her body seem to be prioritizing?

Does her pregnancy supplement plan still make sense postpartum?

What needs to change now that she is breastfeeding?

What support does Baby appear to need?

Does baby need mom to take anything so they can get it through mom's milk?

Does baby need nervous system support (homeopathy) to balancefrom the birth process?

Are there areas of digestion, nervous-system regulation, structural balance or breastfeeding support that deserve more attention?

We don't hand every mother the same protocol. Are there some basics that we know biochemically, realistically all mothers will need? Absolutely! Vitamin C, Trace Minerals, and deep nutrition (dessicated liver pills help most people with this), are all great choices.

We believe in customizing support to the mother and baby who are actually sitting in front of us to get individualized and expedited healing!

The Postpartum Session I Wish I Had Earlier

Our special Mother + Baby postpartum session really grew out of two things:

my own experience going through postpartum five times and counting, and years of clinical experience supporting mothers through this exact season.

I wanted to create the kind of appointment I wish every mother could have after birth.

A space where we are asking, “How is the baby?”

AND we're also asking:

How is Mama?

How is her body recovering?

What changed during pregnancy and birth?

What does she need nutritionally now?

How can we support breastfeeding?

What does Baby need?

And what can we simplify so she isn't trying to piece all of this together while sleep-deprived and holding a newborn?

If you're preparing for postpartum, I encourage you to think about this care before the baby arrives.

Build the meal support.

Buy the warm socks.

Set up the lamps.

Fill your freezer.

Have your minerals ready.

Choose the books you want to listen to.

Make space to rest.

And plan for someone to check on you, too.

Because postpartum isn't about getting your old body back.

It's about supporting the body that just did something extraordinary as it heals, replenishes, feeds, regulates and rebuilds...and bonds with a new person and leans into this new season!

And if you're in that season right now: God sees you.

You don't have to rush through it.